I fell in a snow bank and couldn't get up

I fell after work in the parking lot of work on Tuesday because it was literally like a skating rink out there. I am fine. Thank goodness for my very large behind that I landed on and that it was 5:30 so nobody seen me. My 80-year-old coworker had baked Chad a pie because he had shoveled for her when it snowed 27 times ago. I was carrying the homemade pie when I fell and it slid way across the parking lot sort of like a very large hockey puck, if I was playing hockey I would have TOTALLY made a goal. After I fell I looked around and thought DAMN IT, now I have to get up and retrieve that pie on the freaking other side of the parking lot. Of course my purse went the complete opposite way. I had to re slide to other freaking side of the parking to pick that up and then I then discovered that I had a purse full of snow and ice. I am thinking if somebody was taping me we could have won $10,000 on AFV. The pie actually didn't break, isn't that amazing? I was really hoping for huge bruises on me to prove that I fell, but instead I was just super sore on Wednesday and looked like Frankenstein. My butt hurt, my knee hurt, my elbow hurt and I was moving oh so very slowly. *sigh*

YES, I am super duper happy we moved to where it snows every freaking day for 4 months straight, thanks for asking.