This is for you Bama Ann

Dear Bama Ann,

Hello. In regards to your very nice inquiry....yes I AM going to blog again. I think about it daily, well, maybe not DAILY but at least monthly. I don't seem to have the energy to do much but exist. Coupled with the fact that I can't seem to get near my computer due to Trent, Connor, or Chad blogging has fallen to the wayside. *sigh*

Here is a recap of my life:

Crazydruggiesister and her effin boyfriend have been living here in my house with me, Chad, and the boys for the last 6 MONTHS. I really don't know quite how it happened actually. She came up to be with Kendra, who had a baby in October, and my Dad brought her and effin boyfriend up and they just haven't left. I must say that my patience is wearing rather thin and she & I have been fighting non stop for about the last 3 weeks. I told her today that she HAS to move out. I can't take it anymore. She just pretends she doesn't hear me or that she doesn't understand. More to come on this every evolving drama I am sure!

I am trying to fight the guilt. My ever present guilt. I should be Jewish for all the guilt that I carry around.....

After long and careful consideration I decided to stop practicing the religion I have been a part of for my entire life. It was a long time in coming. It has been a series of adjustments, and most days I think I made the right decision. Chad agreed with me and has made the same decision as I. This is a MAJOR change in our life. I spent all of Christmas bawling hysterically if that gives you any indication of how it's been. I can't really explain it without spelling the whole thing out, and well....

I am still in the process of figuring out WHAT I believe now. I am lost when it comes to faith and whom I am. My religion has defined me for my whole life, so not to have it causes a major identity crisis as one can imagine. Perhaps it will just take time?

I am no longer working with DragonLady. HURRAH! I still work for the same organization, but not for HER in HER department. I have been at my new job for almost 6 months. It is, without a doubt, the best thing I ever did for myself. I have my own office~with a door. Glory be!

Chad is facing some serious health problems again. It is beyond scary, and nearly paralyzes me with fear. I am going with him to the Doctor on Monday where he is having a CT scan of his sinus's, and then a follow up with his Doc after that.

I was diagnosed with fibromalygia a few years ago. Most days I am okay, but mainly I am debilitated with major fatigue. Working full time, trying to be a half way decent Mother and wife, and dealing with crazydruggiesister and her effin boyfriend completely sucks my life of ambition and energy.

With this lackluster attempt at updating this sad and pathetic blog I will sign off. For now. I will attempt to come back and update this blog tomorrow. Well,maybe not tomorrow. Maybe next week! Okay, maybe next month?

Bama Ann, thank you for your comment. And please let me know how you are???

Love,
Pollyanna